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Sunday, September 4, 2011

The Last First Day???? Part Two

It is now the beginning of September, the 4th to be exact, so we are dangerously close to the dreaded "first day of school," a day that has lived in infamy for me personally for almost all of my life, with the exception of probably about six years total!

When I was a little girl I was horribly school phobic (go figure) to the point where I once ran all the way back home in the rain after my mother had dropped me off at school.  So beginning the new school year with trepidation has had a rich and storied history for me that lingers to this late day.

Usually starting about Thursday of the week before school I get "that feeling," that nagging little disconcerting feeling that something is just not right, and as Labor Day weekend ensues, I become progressively more and more out of sorts, not a debilitating fear, just a nasty little prickly sensation lurking right beneath the surface of my skin.  I try to put it out of my mind by keeping busy, planning activities, going to my beloved beach, but as soon as I slow down, there it is, that sinking feeling that used to be, as a kid, full blown nausea.  For those non-teachers out there, imagine the feeling of starting a new job after being out of work for two months, but this new job, from moment number one, requires you to be at top performance strength, and has you working on a daily basis with what an old colleague of mine used to refer to as "unfinished persons." For my fellow teachers, especially the new ones, I wish I could say it goes away after a few years, but I'd be lying to you.

So why the dress?  Well, one of the ways that I have developed of coping with that miserable first day feeling is to make sure that I have my "first day of school dress" ready to go to work with me. (This year I bought it in June because you know those crazy season rushing department stores.  I can't exactly wear a woolen dress on September 7!) You know how you always feel better in a brand new outfit, one without any memories attached to it?  A clean slate.  Who doesn't enjoy the feeling of cutting the tags off?  It gives you a little lift just to know that even if you don't feel so good, at least you look good, in the paraphrased words of the old Billy Crystal Fernando Lamas Saturday Night Live parody.

On the morning of September 7th, I'll wake up at 5:40, cut off my tags, choke down a quick breakfast, and start what just might be the last first day of school of my entire life, and I'll be thinking of how much I'll enjoy the Labor Day Weekend next year.  Hell, I might even go to the U.S. OPEN!

2 comments:

Unknown said...

I had my last first day of school too!

Erin (Out on a Limb) said...

I love the dress and know that feeling all too well. This was the first year since I decided not to return to BHS that I had that feeling again, except it was for my little peanut. Thanks for sharing. Hope it was a great last first day (or maybe last first day ; )