Well, before you think I am that cynical, let me preface this blog by saying that the one that will follow is, "Ten Things I Love about School." So I sat down, in this year of sitting down and taking inventory, and came up with a list of things that I surely will not miss about school (And weirdly, I hardly ever call my job "work." It is always "school," just as I never go by calendar year, always school year). The list is simply in the order in which they occurred to me.
1. You have to start teaching at "the crack of ass" (sorry, just think that is the funniest expression). At 7:45 a.m., when most people are just getting ready to leave for work, we are already up in front of the classroom, trying to get 25 comatose teenagers to pay attention to us.
2. Which brings me to another item. I once had a colleague call the teenagers we teach, "unfinished persons." And I have always thought that to be such an apt description. Kids will say anything that occurs to them, at any time, anywhere, with practically no filters. And those little devils notice EVERYTHING!! God forbid they pay attention to what you are teaching. Nuh-uh!! Last week I had a kid in my eighth grade class tell me that there was a map on the bottom of my shoe. I had had those shoes for six months and never knew about any map.
3. You never really know what sort of day you are going to have. Sometimes you can get up and be in a pretty good mood when you get to school, actually ready to have a good day, with some interesting lessons planned that you are totally prepared for BUT -the copy machine is down, the internet is down, your door lock is jammed with pencil lead, "Johnny" throws a tantrum, you get an unexpected drop-in by the principal, some kid poops on your floor!! (all true events)
4. You can't hide. When you are not feeing well, either physically or emotionally, you have to hide it and still perform. That room filled with 25 little (big) bodies is not going to sit quietly by while you gather yourself together.
5. And you'd sure better develop strong control of any bodily functions. The bathroom can call only on a free period or within the three minute between classes. And certainly not while you have a group of foreign exchange students from France as guest speakers.
1 comment:
The bathroom situation was one of my greatest nuisances! I remember teaching four in a row during both pregnancies, and I always had to have a mental list of nearby 'helpers' who could mind the cherubs in a pinch. Now, I have a ridiculous ability to hold my bladder for great stretches of time ; ) Great post, Fran! All so true. (I can't believe some kid pooped on your floor!)
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